Feel Happier By Mary Jaksch What do people remember about you when you walk out of the room? In my case, I may think it’s my background and knowledge that makes me special, but it’s more likely that what’s really memorable is seeing food magically transports itself from my plate onto the floor or onto other laps when I’m excited… What makes YOU special? Take a look at the following list of 35 things that make you special. It’s like a life inventory. When you consider all the questions, you’ll get a sense of how your life is at the moment, and how you could change it to bring out YOUR special uniqueness. 1. Personality What is your personality? Take a look at the following personality types according to the Enneagram. Are you An idealistic Reformer, a caring Helper, a success-oriented Achiever, an introspective Idealist, an idealistic Reformer, a caring Helper, a success-oriented Achiever, a sensitive Individualist, an intense Investigator, a security-oriented Loyalist, a spontaneous Enthusiast, a powerful Challenger, or a reassuring Peacemaker? You can take the Enneagram test here. 2. Signature style What’s your signature style? Are you engaging, entertaining, moving, intense, funny, bold, ditzy, serene, boring, or threatening? 3. Beliefs What do you believe about life, the universe, or about yourself? Do you have religious beliefs? Do have beliefs about yourself that limit your potential? 4. Spirituality Are you drawn to the mysteries of life? Do you use spiritual practice, i.e. meditation, prayer, or other to nurture your spirituality? 5. Aspirations What are your aspirations? Do you strive for a cause that is greater than you? 6. Dominant sense Each of us has a dominant sense through which we experience the world. What is your dominant sense? Is it sight or sound or touch? 7. Thoughts What kind of thoughts are mostly in your mind? Are they daydreams, or thoughts focussed on your current project? Is your mind usually focused on the past, on the present, or on the future? 8. Goals What are your goals? Have you recorded them? Which goals we choose, and whether we set them determines a substantial part of our uniqueness. Click here to learn how to set goals. 9. Creativity Are you creative? Do you create at work, or write, paint, cook, or in any other way? Often people who are creative are more lively and happier than those who are not. Find out what makes us creative. 10. Happiness How happy are you? Take the test here to see how happy you are. Find out what authentic happiness is. 11. Attitude What is your habitual attitude? Is it negative or positive? Our attitude is shaped by influence and association, beliefs, thoughts, expectations, and self-talk. How was your attitude shaped? 12. Attraction What are you drawn to? What are your favourite colours? What’s your favourite music, climate, or food? What kind of people do you like?\13. Genes We are shaped by both heredity, as well as environment. What traits have you inherited from your parents that make you unique? 14. Body The size and build of our body is genetically encoded. However, how we care for our bodies determines what it looks like. Check out the following questions: Are you slim or overweight? Are you fit or out of shape? Are you flexible enough to touch your toes? Is your body able to practise sports, or dance, or do yoga, or train in martial arts? If you have a physical disability, are you stretching your capability to the limit, or not? 15. Face The face is a mirror of the soul. If we are kindly and upbeat, our face looks animated and relaxed. If we feel down, or anxious or ill, our face looks tight and grey. What is your face like? Do you take moments to relax your face? 16. Ethnicity What is your ethnic origin? Are you proud of your culture of origin and your ancestors, or not? 17. Culture What is your culture? Is it followed by the majority or a minority of the people around you? In what way does your culture influence your life? 18. Voice We are born with a particular voice and its resonance, tone and pitch. However, it can be developed – as actors and singers know. What is your unique voice like? 19. Diction Do you speak with an accent or a dialect? The way we pronounce the language we use is a unique marker. 20. Gender Gender is only partly determined by body formation. What masculine and feminine traits do you see in yourself? 21. Health Good and bad health are life’s gift and burden. What really shapes our uniqueness is the attitude to health. What is your attitude? Are you pro-active or passive? Do you complain or actively seek healing? 22. Hormones Hormonal patterns determine whether we are tired, or hungry, or irritated, or lustful. What hormonal patterns or surges are noticeable in your life and how do they influence you? 23. Age Age is a biological factor. But it is also influenced by the mind. Do you feel old and unfit, as well as low on energy and drive? Or do you feel vitally alive, energetic and youthful? If you want to feel youthful, you need to put effort into keeping your mind and body in good shape. How do you keep in good shape? 24. Intelligence Being intelligent is not only having a high IQ. Intelligence is now seen to include social, emotional, and physical aptitude. Your mix of these strands of intelligence is what makes you unique. How do you maintain and develop your intelligence? 25. Life experience Each of us has a unique experience of life. Used wisely, experience is valuable because we can recognise patterns and respond appropriately. Which life experience has shaped you most? 26. Childhood The childhood we experienced in the past makes us unique today. What was your childhood like? How has it shaped you? If your childhood included traumatic experiences, what have you undertaken in order to heal from them? 27. Trauma What kind of life crises have you experienced? Have you integrated them, or are they still unresolved? (My upcoming Ebook From Tragedy to Triumph: How to Win Through a Life Crisis explains how to integrate difficult experiences). 28. Opportunities We have all encountered different opportunities in life. What kind of opportunities have you encountered or created? How have you responded to them? What we make of opportunities is part of what makes us special. 29. Relationships Whom and what we relate to makes us who we are. Which human beings do you love or feel connected to? Whom do you feel disconnected with? What about the environment – do you love nature, or the city? What is your relationship to animals – which are your favourite animals? 30. Learning Your stance towards learning makes you unique. Is continuous learning important to you or not? Do you like formal study or informal learning? What kind of learning environments work best for you? 31. Habits How do you spend your time on a regular basis? How much time to you spend on passive recreation, such as TV? Do you have an unpaid activity that you enjoy? How important is this activity to you? 32. Work Most people spend more time at work than asleep. How we spend this big chunk of our life makes us unique. What do you define as your main work? Do you work for yourself or work for others? Do you work mostly alone or with a team of others? Are you passionate about your work or is it a chore? Do you earn enough to keep yourself going or are you struggling financially? 33. Quirks and foibles What are your quirky habits? As I said in the introduction, these foibles can be the thing that people enjoy about us. 34. Communication style Psychologists pinpoint four different communication styles. Are you a Relater, Socialiser, Thinker, or Director? 35. The life journey Each of us is on a unique life path. Which path we follow defines a part of our uniqueness. What path have you chosen? What strikes me is that we are able to change most of these variables! What makes us truly special is how we spend our energy, thoughts, and time, as well as how we respond to whom and what we encounter. It’s in your power to evolve and bring forth the unique, special person that you are. That’s an awesome responsibility When you read this list, what did you realise about your life? Please share you thoughts in the comments.