By Mary Jaksch
A fellow blogger who is putting together a collaborative post asked me a searching questions today:
What triggered a paradigm shift in your life?
It’s an interesting question, isn’t it? Try and answer it for yourself and see what appears.
I came up with a moment of truth that changed my life forever. But it seems to me that it’s the catalyst – the moment that triggers change – is like the tip of an iceberg. Below, in the subconscious realm of our mind, the decision to change is already in place. All it needs is a trigger-moment to activate the decision. Here was my catalyst for change:
When I started karate training 25 years ago, I was working as a professional flautist. After I had trained for some months. I became a volunteer at the karate school’s half-way house. This had been set up for young people who wanted to get off drugs and alcohol, and change their life around. I helped set up and run a full-time program with daily karate classes, meditation, and community work.
One day, Marion, a young woman who had been working on the streets as a prostitute said to me, “You’ve helped me change my life. I’ve decided to go back to school, and get a life that’s worth living.” That was a turning point for me. I decided to change careers, and started to study psychotherapy. I realized that listening to me playing the flute on stage wasn’t going to be the thing that turns a life around.
Once I understood that my life should really be about helping people to live meaningful lives, it was time for a radical change. It was hard because my divorce happened at the same time, and I turned from high-profile professional into a solo mum and student.
Start over
I’m in the process of re-writing the Ebook that was originally called ‘Overcome Anything’. When I first wrote it, I was in the middle of a sudden life change, brought about by a financial misfortune. Now, two years on, I’ve learned a lot about the next stage of starting over, which is the re-emergence into the light. When we start over in life, either because we choose to, or because we are forced to, we have an amazing opportunity to start something new. Like I did when I started blogging and created Goodlife ZEN.
I hope to have the Ebook completed by March. If you have a story of how your life changed dramatically, please email me. I would love to include your story either in this Ebook, or in the sequel.
There is an interesting TED video by Tony Robbins on ‘Why we do what we do’.
Watch it below, or click here to see it.
So, what triggered a paradigm shift in your life?
Please share in the comments.
This FREE chapter of my Ebook will show you
how to overcome anything.
- Turn challenges into opportunity.
- Cope with change without falling apart.
- Find new meaning for your life
- Find serenity, happiness and meaningful success.
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A divorce
.-= jr cline´s last blog ..Positive Week 7 =-.
Hi Mary,
it’s interesting to read of the ‘revelations’ that both you and the woman at the halfway house experienced.
Stories of fundamental changes in people’s lives are always inspiring.
My own paradigm shift came when I realised that, while I thought I was happy with who I was, I wasn’t as happy as I could be. The main issue was that I was overweight which, deep down, was affecting my confidence and participation in doing the things I really wanted to do.
Yet, you’d never have guessed this as I was quite outgoing (having appeared in 5 tv game shows!); I had a high profile job I loved, and a great circle of friends.
But, I knew I could be more…
So, after some serious strategic re-thinking and action, I lost 98 pounds in weight.
By doing this, I seemed to unlock other areas of my life – family, relationships, work, leisure and began to achieve so much more. I call it the ‘domino effect’ of change.
I think it’s important to add that the initial change doesn’t have to be huge in itself… even small paradigm shifts which, at first, seem insignificant or lacking in ambition, can end up producing amazing results, when the ‘domino effect’ takes place.
.-= Scott McIntyre´s last blog ..The Cautious Person’s Guide to Risk Taking =-.
Good food for thought Mary. I believe we don’t change until we are ready to do so. For me, I shift my thinking when I hear my inner voice shout to me “what you’re doing is no longer is working.”
Over the years, I have learned my inner voice is seldom wrong.
Alex
I think a more interesting question is why do so many people suffer from paradigm paralysis? Most folks exhibit the inability or refusal to see beyond the current models of thinking, so “shifts” in their paradigm or changes in their mental framework comes slowly … if ever at all.
Most rent space in someone elses head or blindly adopt the majority view. They have a paradigm… but it’s not their own. They haven’t earned it. They’ve borrowed their ideas and opinions from others.
For those interested in a personal revolution that can set you free and radically change your life for the better, you must challenge your own paradigm.
.-= Contrarian´s last blog ..Blogging is Dead- When the Bubble Bursts =-.
My paradigm shift happened in 2007 when I read The Secret!
Now I know most Law of Attraction gurus roll their eyes and poo-poo the book and the dvd as a watered down, mainstream version of the REAL stuff, but for me it was revelatory.
It affirmed something I’d always suspected deep down, but never had the courage to hold to the light and Affirm ~ that I Was Directly Responsible for What Had Happened in my Life, and more importantly, What COULD Happen in the future!
Within 6 weeks, my husband and I had sold our house for precisely the price we wanted, moved to warmer climes and bought our dream house for exactly the same price, taken a trip to London, and wangled our way into turning our jobs into telecommuting.
Nothing has had a greater influence on the trajectory and quality of my life, and while I may find more profound or comprehensive teachings on the subject, I will always consider that little book to be pivotal to my success.
Bliss-ings,
the goddess known as Jacqui
.-= Jacqueline Gates@inner goddess´s last blog ..90 Day Plans and Transitions =-.
Mary,
This is such an interesting topic for exploration. I’m always amazed by stories from your life. You’ve done so many interesting things and have contributed so much to the world.
I believe that who we are now is a product of our thoughts, words, and deeds in the past. Moments of grace arise as a result of positive past actions. The secret is to see and capture these glimmers of grace to transform our life in this moment. What we will be depends on what we do now, think, and say now.
I love the saying, “You can’t push the river, it flows by itself.” You can’t force a paradigm shift, but when the moment comes go with the flow… just like you did in the story above. Jump in the river. Although we can’t force a paradigm shift, there’s so much we can do to be more receptive to one, starting with living in this precious present moment.
.-= Sandra Lee´s last blog ..Free Yourself with Free Writing =-.
“…life should really be about helping people to live meaningful lives…”
I really like that comment because, in my opinion, it truly is the essence of life.
I’m a writer who creates the Pug At The Beach books which I consider tools for personal transformation because so many of my readers have been positively impacted by them. (Pug, a small dog who lives on an island and shares the wisdom he’s gained from walking the beach everyday, is part Dalai Lama, part Jimmy Buffett.)
My own paradigm shift occurred after being MIS-diagnosed with terminal cancer and given 6 months to live. As a direct result of this MIS-diagnosis, I no longer had a job which then prompted me into a new career – writing. My own book, Pug At The Beach, An island dog’s reflections on life, gave me the personal strength to pursue my own personal transformation/dream of leaving my home of 25 years and moving to the beach.
So, within this one big paradigm shift were several others and I find this often is the case. One step will lead to another and another until the act of change is no longer feared but invited. Anyone who has walked the difficult path of adversity knows that the journey begins with one step.
Jackson Dunes
Author of Pug At The Beach, An island dog’s reflections on life
http://amzn.to/JacksonDunes
Beautiful, beautiful post Mary. My biggest paradigm shift was walking down to the mailbox a few years ago during a time of deep despair and experiencing a sudden, devastating sense of worthlessness.
I saw I had beeen a sham in many ways. Right on the heels of that dire experience another equally powerful realization blazed thru me.
I became aware of the presence of something that definitely wasn’t a sham. It was timeless and free and perfect — and it was who I truly was. My life changed drastically in that moment.
.-= Christopher Foster´s last blog ..Love your own unconquerable spirit — and be free =-.
My paradigm shift happened about two years. My exH and I had been divorced about a year and half. He’d had an affair with a woman from our church, and they were on the rocks. During the previous month he’d hinted about the two of us getting back together, but I think THEY got back together about this time. He and I had been communicating, but then he sent me an email in which the said he thought of me as being “needy” (among other things). That was it for me. He’d insulted me one too many times, and I began enforcing my earlier decision to go “No Contact”. I had been responding to his communications and overtures out of a sense that we were communicating, and that communication was always a good thing. I have since found that that is not always the case – especially when there is evidence of pathological personality disorders.
My indignant reaction to his perception of my ‘neediness’ was the catalyst for enforcing a decision I had already made, but had been unable to stick to. It was the greatest gift I have ever received.
I love your story, Mary–such a great example of the curtain opening up on Act II of your life, which is how I think of paradigm shifts. I’ve gone through several and feel like I’m in the midst of another. I believe that if we can learn to look for these shifts in what I call “splats,” we develop enormous inner power because we turn the negatives in our lives, like your divorce, into platforms that launch us into better and better experiences AND more positive impact on those around us.
It was a year ago.
I lost my tutoring job to the recession, my mother, who I had been taking care of, fell into another bout of depression, my boyfriend broke up with me, and I didn’t end up getting into grad school. I was broken open.
My sister recommended I start a blog about this book I had been talking about writing. I started it, and nearly a year later I ended up on your other blog, “Write to Done” as one of The Top Ten Blogs for writers.
Who knew? Thank you. It was the confidence booster I needed.
well I feel like I’ve been coming on a big change for a long while, but the wheels have been rolling slowly it seems. Your blog and A 1 Blogger are keeping me going though.
Holly
Hi Mary,
Beautiful post, as always. And thought-provoking as always too… It’s so helpful in so many ways to hear how you moved through change with such grace and become someone who offers so much as a result. Inspiring doesn’t even begin to describe it.
I’m aware of 3 very big shifts in my life, every one of them initiated by a difficulty.
But even though they each caused a real and major transformation of who I was and how I experienced the world, it’s not until now (as I move through this latest one) that I believe I’m experiencing a genuine and complete paradigm shift.
I expect I just may have to email you with the nuts and bolts. Thanks for soliciting our input, and for the great post.
.-= Patti Foy´s last blog ..Kiss Your Cold Goodbye Fast With These 20 Natural and Vibrational Remedies =-.
Mary: I loved this post and I think I came across it at the perfect time. It spoke right to me and is so inspiring. Thank you. “When we start over in life, either because we choose to, or because we are forced to, we have an amazing opportunity to start something new.” That is such a powerful statement. I am going to have to add that one to my list of quotes so I can keep it top of mind. Thanks for the wisdom.
.-= Sibyl – alternaview´s last blog ..Why You Should Take Chances to Make Things Happen =-.
Hi Mary,
This post is so interesting your life, the question and the above responses. I’ve had more than one like Patti. I guess when you get to closing in on 60 it makes sense. Thanks for having us all pause and review!
.-= Tess The Bold Life´s last blog ..62 Tips to Create Your Own Love Story =-.
“When we start over in life, either because we choose to, or because we are forced to, we have an amazing opportunity to start something new.”
Very cool Mary! Interesting too, how if you don’t make the choice, sometimes life comes around and sweetens the deal.
This happened to me and triggered the most significant shift my life ever took. 10 years ago I switched careers and started working with at-risk youth. I almost didn’t make the move but a well timed snowstorm sealed the deal.
I just wrote about it in my latest post “How Mooseheart Saved My Life – Part 1”
Good luck with the new e-book. I’m sure it will be great!
Peace, JR
I think it’s not so much the paradigm shift as much as the journey to get to the tipping point where the bucket was full and spilled over. I think my shift came as a number of cups of water poured in the bucket. Some events contributed more water than others. The depth that the water touches when contributed doesn’t soak into the next persons bucket quite like it did with us. So in terms of being able to pin point paradigm shifts as single events is difficult and never seems to effect others as it did ourselves. This makes it more difficult for me to have my shift resonate with you and the same frequency it did with me.
I think it’s important to me to focus on those positive items that resulted from the shift. That I am grateful to be more aware, focused, authentic and centered. Those things are visible to the people around me who have said since the last shift that I just appear to be much more comfortable living in my own skin. That translation of paradigm shift is bigger to be that my story of how I got there.
http://www.sl4.org/shocklevels.html
Existential Shock levels, often (if not every time) a shift per level goes with a paradigm shift…
Perceptions, points-of-view, knowledge revelation…(through which ever way, learning, trauma, pain, happyness, etc) tend to also trigger shifts…
Well, just me thoughts around it
Thats awesome you realized a meaningful life is when you choose to help others and i wanted to thank you for waking up and realizing the power you have to change people around you and how far it can really go. I too, have realized the same thing and together people all across the world will slowly wake up and see things because of what we see in others. Our projections can travel to the farthest distances impossible to comprehend. Keep changing the world.
Love,
Warren