Comments on: What You Need to Know Before Starting a New Habit

By: 

 — Thu, 31 Mar 2011 18:23:33 +0000

very nice post, i clearly enjoy this web site, keep on it.

By: Clay Franklin

Clay Franklin — Wed, 13 Jan 2010 08:19:35 +0000

I love this article. I am in a “wake up productive” class that is three months long.
The instructor told us to only change one thing at a time (or two max).
He also told us that it takes 30 days for a new habit to be formed and the first 20 days are the most difficult. I am starting with exercise, drink water and quite smoking. The exercise is a lot easier than quitting smoking and drinking water in the morning is easy to remember. The exercise and water is happening already and quitting smoking is going to be soon.
I am delighted I found this blog article on twitter tonight as it relates exactly to the class I am taking about change and it reinforces the need to change and the why.
.-= Clay Franklin´s last blog ..10 Tips to Improve Your Web Site and Measure the Results with Analytics =-.

By: Diana

Diana — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 22:12:24 +0000

I love the Perlman quote, seems so true. I wish it were that easy! But I keep trying to find a way. .-= Diana´s last blog ..One recognizable pile =-.

By: Jared | SpiritualZen.net

Jared | SpiritualZen.net — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 18:19:34 +0000

This post resonates so much with me. I can so relate when someone says… “real change.” Like we’re not talking about a geographical or physical change, but a real psychic change or total shift in our perspective of the universe and our place in it.

I have experienced the pure essence of “if you want something you’ve never had, you must do something you’ve never done.” And YES, the true amazing change was due to emotional and spiritual bankruptcy. The pain of living was simply to much to bear and the fear of losing myself did not matter anymore. The realization was that if I continued to hang on to my “idea” of what my life was to be about, it would kill me.

I often use that reference; that until the pain of living the way I was living was more painful then the fear of change… well, nothing changed. It’s like there were two things I hated more than anything; the way things were and change. I was stuck there for so long, until it was just too painful to live anymore.

I left behind (actually in a physical and mental place) every conceived notion of what I thought life was supposed to be about; I surrendered and asked for help. Help in learning how to love myself and redesign my life; a life which turned out now to be based on spiritual principles. Something I didn’t even realize I was missing.

The best way to describe it is just like the photo you used with the butterfly. It took several years and still continues, but the change is so profound that my life resembles nothing of the past. It’s just so amazing it’s hard to express in words… but tears often rise from the depth of my heart in gratitude and appreciation for life and all it’s wonders. Love is every where, where once I found none at all.

For me it took baby steps; one day at a time. If I looked ahead too far (expectations) or where I had been (regret), it was just too overwhelming. I had to learn how to stay in the moment. Having great people help me along the way made all the difference.

I really like what you wrote, “Change happens one moment at a time.” Change happens as the result of experiences we have. More specifically, experiences we have with other people. By making small changes, I get a chance to interact more with the universe around me, thus getting feedback and expanding the amazing experiences in life. It’s like thinking I’m “shy” when really I’m making everything about me. I have to force myself (change) to get out of that mindset at times. Like taking the elevator at work instead of the stairs. God forbid I have to interact with someone… if I’m not interacting with others, I’ll never have a chance to be of service!
.-= Jared | SpiritualZen.net´s last blog ..Don’t Get Caught Overdrawn! Making Deposits into Your Spiritual Bank Account =-.

By: Farouk

Farouk — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 14:53:39 +0000

you are right mary!! lots of people focus on change before getting prepared for it .-= Farouk´s last undefined ..If you register your site for free at =-.

By: Richard | RichardShelmerdine.com

Richard | RichardShelmerdine.com — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 09:25:18 +0000

Totally true. Change happens in the moment, one step at a time. Just concentrate on one habit until secure people. I've tried to do several a million times and failed and the one time i concentrate on one at a time it works! It feels amazing. Great post as always. Loved the header image. .-= Richard | RichardShelmerdine.com´s last blog ..Awareness Meditation =-.

By: How to Cope with Pain

How to Cope with Pain — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 18:58:21 +0000

I find the concepts of “stages of change” helpful when I work with patients regarding changing behavior – either starting something new (eg exercise) or stopping an unwanted habit (eg smoking). “Stages of Change” identifies steps we go through when changing habits, and what is most helpful at each step.

I’ve written 2 articles about this, which can help you be more successful with habit change.
Thanks for the interesting post!
http://www.howtocopewithpain.org/blog/1770/pain-management-class-2010/
.-= How to Cope with Pain´s last blog ..Pain Management Class 2010: How To Change A Habit =-.

By: Alejandro Reyes

Alejandro Reyes — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 14:58:16 +0000

Wonderful post!

I must say, it is really hard to change, but not impossible and even if it takes us more than what we thought at first, it is worth all the effort. Even small changes can get the steam rolling.

For those struggling I suggest starting small, want to learn how to keep your house uncluttered, start by placing the keys in their place for a couple of weeks, then add items as you progress.

Thanks for sharing Mary!
.-= Alejandro Reyes´s last blog ..Friday fun… =-.

By: Jesse

Jesse — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 14:19:05 +0000

I’m actually in the midst of making several rather large changes in my life. The first and most obvious to the outside observer was changing my diet. I’ve lost somewhere in the area of 40+ lbs so far and have never felt better! you’re right about changes when some sort of addiction is involved, cold turkey is the only way. I made the switch to my new diet style in a couple of days so I wouldn’t obsess over how much of certain foods I no longer eat I could still have during a ‘transition period.’

Next up…I work on not being such a surly sob…;-)

Wait, that wasn’t the question was it?

By: lamia

lamia — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 13:11:37 +0000

Great post Mary, Thank you!
From my humble experience, one of the best ways of changing your habits is by replacing them by new ones.
I used to spend hours in front of TV and then I realized how much of a waste that was. I decided that instead of watching a movie I’ll read the book on which it was based (if that was possible of course). I found myself caught in books and gradually I replaced the “watching TV” habit with a reading habit. And it was almost painless .