Comments on: Is Flexible Optimism a Key to Happiness?

By: Learned Helplessness Destorys Resilancy | The Art of Manliness

Learned Helplessness Destorys Resilancy | The Art of Manliness — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 22:08:25 +0000

[...] the key is not to wear rose-colored glasses all the time, but to be what Seligman calls a “flexible optimist.” This means seeing the world accurately, reacting appropriately-using the right explanatory [...]

By: Kent @ The Financial Philosopher

Kent @ The Financial Philosopher — Fri, 29 May 2009 17:44:56 +0000

This is a thought-provoking post, Mary, as are the comments. I have discovered and observed that optimism and pessimism are simply natural occurrences that, when self-manufactured, are often self-defeating. If, however, optimism and pessimism are simply "allowed to happen," the natural course of them leads to a better place. For example, if one becomes aware of their own pessimism, the healthiest course to take is not to self-manufactured optimism -- it is to allow pessimism to run its course. "The resistance to the unpleasant situation is the root of suffering." ~ Ram Dass Kent @ The Financial Philosophers last blog post..De-bunking the Case for Hyper-Inflation

By: Mary Jaksch

Mary Jaksch — Fri, 29 May 2009 05:18:59 +0000

Hi everyone!
I noticed today that many proverbs take the position of flexible optimism.
For example:

“A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”

Or the Russian version:
“A titmouse in the hand is better than a crane in the sky.”

Or do you think that’s pessimistic?

By: Anthony

Anthony — Thu, 28 May 2009 07:34:22 +0000

Excellent post. Flesible optimissm is a nice term to remember. Some people mistake optimism for foolishness. Anthonys last blog post..Arizona jobs

By: Karl Staib - Work Happy Now

Karl Staib - Work Happy Now — Thu, 28 May 2009 03:02:46 +0000

I never thought of flexible optimism before, but I like it. I don't believe I can fly to pluto and I'm ok with that. I do believe that I can build a popular blog that helps a lot of people work happier. We have to know our strengths and not try to do everything. If we over do it, we'll just burn out and nothing great is accomplished. Karl Staib - Work Happy Nows last blog post..Daily Body Scan

By: Mary Jaksch

Mary Jaksch — Wed, 27 May 2009 10:47:35 +0000

Wow! What fantastic comments!

I was struck by David Cain’s interpretation of optimism:
“A non-fear-based approach to assessing a situation.”

I agree that the terms ‘pessimism’and ‘optimism’ and are too black and white.
The reality is that what shapes our life are the moment to moment decisions and judgments that we make.

The problem is that these judgments are often habitual, and clouded by fear or hope.

By: Sami

Sami — Tue, 26 May 2009 22:26:41 +0000

This is an interesting take on optimism vs pessimism. I'd never really thought about choosing between the two as a strategy. I've always assumed it's better to always be optimistic. When I think about it though, I would rather be optimistic but with a realist/empathetic view for every situation rather than temporarily pessimistic. Maybe it's just semantics and we're actually saying the same thing. If you're an optimistic realist you can have empathy when needed (eg not alienating someone who's going through something tough with your "stay positive" comments) whilst not losing your overall optimism. Samis last blog post..How I Built a Daisy List & Why - Part 1

By: Chris Edgar | Purpose Power Coaching

Chris Edgar | Purpose Power Coaching — Tue, 26 May 2009 21:02:47 +0000

Thanks for this post. One thing I’d add is that it’s possible to acknowledge that we’ve made a mistake, like the driver in your example, without blaming or ceasing to love ourselves. It’s the difference between saying “oh, oops, I guess I’ll get back on the other side of the road,” and saying “oh, I’m such an idiot for doing this, why do I always do such stupid things.”

By: Christopher

Christopher — Tue, 26 May 2009 01:23:01 +0000

I enjoyed this post alot. I think finding this balance is so important for a lot of people. Most of my self help junkie friends have an almost religious sense of optimism that can really easily alienate people who are experiencing real suffering. Sometimes it takes a bit more than just looking on the bright side. Thanks for this. Christophers last blog post..stones-reflection.jpg

By: Kaushik

Kaushik — Mon, 25 May 2009 20:24:55 +0000

Hi Alex, Thanks for your comment, and we agree: anti-depressants are fine, but they treat the symptoms only. Buddhism, awakening, awareness, release are fundamental solutions. Mental trickery, like pretending to be positive or optimistic, doesn't work; however, for those who resonate with cognitive solutions, there is CBT, Byron Katie's The Work, and so on. But it's important to recognize the organic, biochemical or physiological component of depression. I am not saying there is a cause-and-effect; however, it clearly is a component. Depression is still a disease of stigma; recognizing the physiological component can help people who don't have personal experience with depression understand why depressives can't simply "snap out of it." Kaushiks last blog post..Exit the world of fear and sadness - 3rd ebook excerpt Awakening is Simple