Photo by Nexus
To effect lasting change, you need to access the total power of mind and body.
Here are five ways to use your inner power to make your New Year’s resolution stick.
The first and most important point is that in order to stick, resolutions need to be embedded in a life plan. Because change won’t happen unless you have a good sense of where you want to go. Plan your life in five year chunks so that you can gradually change your life over time.
1. Chart your life through the next five years.
A new direction necessarily implies change. Let’s say that a skipper is sailing in a Western direction but wants to reach land in the East. He or she will have to adjust the rudder and the sails to change direction, right? The same rule applies to our life. If we want to embark on a new direction in life, we have to make changes.
Here is how you can chart your life:
Choose 5 different areas of your life. For example, these could be: work, creativity, relationships, spirituality, and health. Take each area in turn and imagine what you might want to be or become in five years time. If you encounter negative thoughts, let them go and focus on your task.
Dare to dream big!
Here is an example of goals set by Monique, a woman who is at present overweight and feels stressed at work.
You will notice that she starts by describing (in present tense) how she will be and feel in five years time. Then she lists how she will be at the end of each year and how she will feel about it.
You can see that Monique’s goals for 2008 call for establishing new habits now. Monique’s New Year’s resolution to become fit and trim will stick because it is part of an exciting life plan. Compare that to the resolution she initially came up with: ‘
I must lose weight’! She would have had a poor chance of succeeding with that because it is connected to negative thoughts and not integrated into a greater life plan.
After you have completed your five-year plan, move on to step number 2.
2. Find your ‘why’
Your five-year life plan will invite some changes for the new year. To change a particular habit , first ask yourself ‘why?’. Let’s say that you want to lose weight. Find out why that is important to you. Do you want to get fit, be healthier, or wear smaller clothes? Or do you want to take up a new sport or activity that demands fitness and a trim body? What is it that’s really important to you about this particular change? Quite simply, if your ‘
why’ isn’t strong enough, change won’t happen!
Once you have found your ‘why’, use emotions to make your goal stick. Play an internal movie of the new you, feel the pleasure, feel the pride, feel the satisfaction of the change that you have effected. Emotions are our strongest motivators!
3. Focus on a positive goal
Once you have found your ‘why’, write it down in form of a goal. Use present tense to describe your goal. For example, if you want to lose weight, your goal could be something like, “I am fit, trim and full of energy.”
4. Make a 10 step plan how to get there
The first step needs to be easily achievable. Ask yourself, ‘
What is the smallest first step towards my goal?’. Write it down. Keep up the first step for 21 consecutive days to establish a habit.
5. Reward yourself after reaching each step of your 10step plan!
It’s good to stop for a moment, to look back at where you have come from, and enjoy the satisfaction of having completed a step of the journey. Plan a reward for each of the ten steps!
***
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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
2007 was a year of adventure for me, so I’m going to keep plugging along doing what I’ve been doing. When I do that I don’t have to make resolutions to live a life of adventure. The adventure comes to me.
Thank you for your comment, Jean. You say, “The adventure comes to me”. I like that. Maybe that’s the secret of resolutions- they are not so much acts of will but invitations. You seem to invite adventure, and so adventure comes to you. When we invite something, we are open to recognising and accepting it.
I really like the idea of writing the affirmations in the present tense. It makes things seem more real, more like you’re getting there already.
The “why” and positive goals are also so important. Positive is a lot more motivating and better for our spirits overall.
I think the “why” is a very important point! Most people think they know what they want … when it’s really just the outward manifestation of what they want. I usually ask them what the goal represents. Using your example, is losing weight about success, self-love, self-acceptance, etc. Because sometimes the “why” can be “because I hate myself the way I am.” And those are the resolutions that NEVER stick, because they connect to negative feelings about ourselves. I agree that emotions are a huge motivator – but if the true “why” behind the goal is negative emotion, we manifest that negativity through self-sabotage by mid-February!
Great article!
Blessings,
Andrea
@ Not Yet a Bodhisattva
Expressing aspirations in a positive way is an act of kindness towards. Too many people treat themselves with a negative and even hostile attitude!
Have a great New Year! I hope your new blog thrives.
@ Andrea
Welcome, Andrea. Your comment about the ‘why’ is very interesting. I think you’re right: there is sometimes a negative ‘why’ hidden under the surface. And sometimes the ‘why’ has nothing to do with our own life. For example, I completed an MA in Buddhist Studies this year. Why? Well, if I’m honest, I did it initially because my mother (who is dead) would have been pleased
Later my natural love of learning took over and provided the motivation for the rest of the three years.
Very inspirational!
I am going to fill out many of these 5-year plans and begin right away.
Thank you, Mary. Your blog continues to have a powerful and positive impact on my life.
It’s really great that people are sharing this infoarimton.