Photo by welsh boy

Dance is a poem. Each movement is a word - Mata Hari

I love dancing. When I was 3 years old I suddenly appeared in the lounge at 11 o’clock at night - stark naked and completely silent. My parents told me that they watched open-mouthed as I began to dance to a complete Beethoven symphony they were listening to. After 30 minutes of dancing, I went back to bed without speaking a single word - so my mother told me. Some years ago, when my mother was slipping into dementia, I told her that I was going to tango classes and was surprised to feel so at home. She looked at me and said, “Oh, you silly mutt- how you could forget how much you love dancing?”

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These days, dance has come back into my life. David, my partner, is a tango teacher and I am his assistant and dance partner. Whenever there is music to dance to, David and I get up and dance -whether it’s the samba in steamy Rio de Janeiro, or the tango in Buenos Aires . I know that some people find it strange that a Zen master should also be passionate about dancing. As if Zen should be severe and otherworldly! In the West we imagine that sensuality and spirituality are at opposite ends of a spectrum.

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There is a close link between dancing and spirituality. I think that one dance in particular is closely aligned to Zen. That’s Argentine tango. To dance the tango you have to abide in mindfulness. The moment a tango dancer falls out of mindfulness into thinking, the connection to the dance and to one’s partner is broken. It’s like falling out of heaven with a thud! There is an interesting book by Chan Park, called Tango Zen. In it he traces the connection between tango and Zen. You can find his website and new blog here.

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When we dance we tap into deeper patterns of the universe and link into life’s vital energy. That is why dance is one of the ancient ways of connection with the sacred and dance forms part of ritual for many spiritual traditions.

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Here are seven ways dancing enhances spirit and body:

1. Dancing fosters intimacy with self and other

When we dance with someone, we open to another person. It’s as if this hard shell that we think of as ‘I’ becomes permeable. Not only does dancing help us connect with others, it also helps us re-connect with ourselves.

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Dancing gets us in touch with who we are. We can so easily to lose touch with aspects of ourselves. When you look back, were you maybe more daring, more outrageous, funny, more sensuous, or more playful in the past? You can recover those submerged parts by dancing. I’ve definitely recovered my innate playfulness and sensuality through dancing! Check out a short clip of a tango performance by David and myself on YouTube:

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2. Dancing promotes health

***Dancing encourages and improves the overall health and fitness of the body. Dancing

• Strengthens bones and muscles without hurting your joints;

• Tones your entire body;

• Improves your posture and balance;

• Increases your stamina and flexibility;

• Reduces stress and tension;

• Wards off illnesses like diabetes, high blood pressure, heart disease, osteoporosis, and depression.

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3. Dancing enhances mood

The beat of music affects both body and mind. A slow piece with a beat of about 60 beats per minute (bpm) can trigger alpha waves in the brain which trigger a tranquil but alert state of mind. Music with a faster beat can accelerate the heart-beat and speed up our endocrine system.

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When we hear and move to music, our body resonates with the sounds we are hearing. Lower frequencies, such as drums produce, are felt in the pelvic area, whereas higher frequencies, such as flutes produce, are felt in the head area.

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As Keti Sharif explains, this is why African warriors dance in low, grounded, aggressive movements to earthy drums, while the Sufi dervishes spin to flutes for enlightenment. Guitar sounds resonate in the mid-body area of the solar plexus and evoke feelings of pride and courage, apparent in Spanish flamenco. The emotive heart area tunes into a higher frequency again, so instruments such as piano accordion, bandoneon, flute, or violin create music that engages feeling and “pulls the heartstrings”.

4. Dancing sharpens the mind

Dancing assists our ability to focus, learn and retain. Learning sequences is good for the mind. Learning to dance creates new neural pathways and helps us to stay younger for longer.

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5. Dancing raises self-esteem

Movement skills build confidence. And with confidence comes a forgetting of self. We get absorbed in the task. Dancing is a wonderful way to appreciate oneself in a new way.

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6. Dancing brings joy

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Dancing lifts the mood. When we feel the music and express it, we can feel joy and well-being. When you learn a particular dance, you may feel awkward and stiff at first, but soon, you will find the graceful you hidden within.

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Mary and David at a tango dance

7. Dancing provides companionship

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Dancing provides opportunities to meet people. Each kind of dance attracts different kinds of people and if you choose the dance form that is right for you, you will meet like-minded people with whom you can connect. I met my partner David at a Latin night 8 years ago. That chance meeting brought lasting joy, love and fun into my life.

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Dancing is a natural human function. Babies delight in bouncing and dancing to music. In the course of assisting David at tango classes, I meet many people who say to me, “I can’t dance; I’ve got two left feet.” But in fact, everyone can dance! All you need to do is to re-discover your innate ability to express yourself in movement.

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PS: You might enjoy this companion article about my tango adventures in Buenos Aires, called Zen and the Art of Travel

Copyright: Mary Jaksch 2008

(Video and second photo courtesy of Robbert Haas)

Photo by Nicholasf

Do you sometimes feel grumpy? I do. It’s a mood that happens to all of us at times.Grumpiness is an important warning sign that our life is out of balance. There are some simple things you can do to bring your life back into line so that you don’t make a habit of being grumpy. After all, grumpiness kills joy and is hard to bear for our loved ones.

In the following I’ve listed 15 ways to get overcome grumpiness. On days that you feel grumpy, read through the list and address just one issue to make you feel better.

1. Acknowledge the mood

Grumpiness is hard on those around us. That is why it’s important to acknowledge being grumpy. Then our partner, family members or friends understand that the grumpiness is not about something they are doing, it is something that you can both examine without feeling anxious or threatened. On grumpy days, I tend to say to my partner: “I’m really grumpy today. I’m sorry I’m being difficult. It’s nothing that you are doing - please be patient with me.” If I say something like that, my grumpiness immediately lessens and my partner David is relieved.

 2. Check your sleep pattern

How much sleep are you getting each 24 hours? I tend to get grumpy if I’m short of sleep. Maybe you can work out how much sleep you need for maximum functioning. You may find that you are trying to survive on less. My suggestion is to go to bed half an hour earlier each night for the next five days and then to see if you feel better. Personally, I find it difficult to go to bed earlier because I’m often immersed in writing or other things in the evening. To help myself, I set my alarm clock an hour before my designated bed-time. This allows me to make a slow transition and to maybe read a couple of pages in bed before going to sleep.

3. Do some exercise

When did you last get really puffed in the fresh air? Or when did you last break into a sweat through exercise? If you are feeling grumpy, chances are that you are not getting the exercise you need. Consider going for a brisk walk each day - even if it’s just for 10 minutes. If you find that difficult, you might like to join some exercise classes to make it easier to keep to a schedule. Try writing down an exercise schedule for the coming week and sticking to it. Then check out how you are feeling.

4. Explore stress

Are you stressed? Sometimes grumpiness is the result of too much stress. If you are, make a list of what is most stressful for you, in order of importance. Each day, tackle one issue that creates stress. For example, in my life everything to do with tax makes me feel quite stressed out. However, once I start tackling problems in this area of my life, my stress level immediately lessens.

 5. Have fun

When did you last do something that was just pure fun? Make sure that you plan something each week that you really enjoy. If you’re not having fun in your life, start something new. Go to dance classes or cooking classes, enroll in a theatre sports class, start potting, or gardening, or surfing. I started kite surfing a couple of months ago. That’s fun -even when your whipped off your feet, go splat in the sea and are then dragged along upsidedown under water!

 6. Avoid negativity 

I notice that when I’m grumpy I seem to collect negative thoughts in my head. Everything seems to get a negative slant. There is a simple way to change this negativity pattern which I learned of a few weeks ago. I read about an American pastor who issues purple bracelets to his flock. They are asked to change it to the other side, each time they start to complain. The goal is to go a whole 21 days without a complaint. You can read more about that here.

When I had a grumpiness attack last week, I thought I would try this method. But I could only half remember it. So I decided to change the rubber band to the other wrist each time I had a negative thought. I tell you, it kept flying from side to side…! I was quite shocked to notice how many negative thoughts my mind generates when I’m grumpy. 

8. Revive your spiritual practice

Usually there is something askew in our life when we’re grumpy. Check to see how your spiritual practice is going. This might be meditation, or mindful exercise or prayer or visualisations, or communing with nature, or many other ways of linking in to a greater view that is not just focussed on ‘I’, ‘me’, ‘mine’. If you are grumpy it might mean that you are neglecting this important part of life that can nurture us so deeply.

 9. Check your goals

Sometimes grumpiness means that our life has drifted into a backwater. Do you have goals? If so, are you following your goals. If you set any goals at the start of the year now is a good time to dig them out and reread them. Are you on track? Maybe there are some long-term dreams that you are following. You may be caught up in the complex process of managing life day-to-day and may have put your long-term dream on the back burner, ready for ‘when I have time’. Instead, you may want to consider assigning just a little time each week to further your goal. For example, I’ve got a novel in the early stages. Each week I use just 30 minutes to muse on the storyline and write just a little. This keeps the project warm.

 10. Take a mini break

When did you last have a holiday? Sometimes we put ourselves and our needs last, instead of listening to our mind and body. If you are grumpy, you may need to have a break. One way to do that is to designate one day in the coming week as a ‘holiday’. Imagine that you come the the place you call home as a tourist. For a whole day, do things a tourist might enjoy. If you have friends or family, rope them in. Playact being tourists!

11. Eat better

What have you been eating lately? Are you eating enough good quality food? Or are you just bolting down food between working moments? Maybe you can choose one evening in the coming week for cooking a special meal. Invite friends and chill out together. You may notice your grumpiness receding.

 12. Check your health

Sometimes grumpiness can be a sign of health problems. In particular, chronic pain can lead to grumpiness. Allow me to ask you some questions: Is your energy lower than usual? Do you have ongoing pain or discomfort? Are you worried about your health? If you answer ‘yes’ to any of these questions, you might like to consult a physician and check out your health.

13. Take time for YOU

Grumpiness can be a sign of resentment. And resentment is a warning sign that we are not respecting and holding necessary boundaries. If you find it difficult to say ‘no’ to requests, you may find that you are overloaded with work and chores and have no time for yourself. You might like to consider setting aside even just one hour for you each week. In this hour you can do whatever you like. I suggest, however, that you use active recreation instead of passive recreation. Passive recreation means watching TV mindlessly for example. Active recreation means doing something to feel better.

 14. Lift self-esteem

How’s your self-esteem? Are you full of self doubt, or do you feel confident about who you are? Low self-esteem is linked to negative self-talk. The more you allow your mind to talk in a negative way about yourself, the more your self-esteem plummets. And the more your self-esteem plummets, the more likely you are to cut yourself down with snide inner remarks. There is a way out, though. It’s a three-step process that I practice.

• Step 1 is noticing when I’m being cruel to myself.
• Step 2 is to stop the thought. If this is difficult I say firmly to myself, “I let go now”.
• Step 3 is to slowly place your hand on your heart region and keep it there for a complete in- and outbreath.

Try this magic - it really works!

15. Play with kids

When I’m feeling grumpy, I go and visit my favourite young friends, Mary and Anna. They immediately involve me in whatever they are playing and I’ll suddenly be transformed into a star, singing in front of thousands, or into a master detective, crawling through the garden to solve a crime. Instead of nursing my grumpiness, I’ll suddenly be rolling on the ground in a wrestling match, or playing tag on the beach. That’s great medicine! 

16. Help others

Helping others can lift us out of grumpiness. The only thing you have to guard against is complaining about any aspect of your life while you are helping others. Is there anyone amongst your friends or neighbours who needs help? Maybe you can find a simple way to assist them. Can you offer childcare for a day, or bake a cake, or take them to the doctor, or write a kind email, or ring them up and ask how they are doing. Keep the focus on them and not on your own woes when you are in contact. A good way to do that is to simply listen to them. That can be your greatest gift to another person.

17. Use Expressive Writing

If you find that your grumpy mood is becoming a habit, try expressive writing. It’s one of the most powerful self-help techniques. Make time for yourself and sit down in a quiet room. Then start writing. You can start quiet simply by starting out like this: “What I am grumpy about is…” Just let the words flow onto the page without stopping. If you find it hard to continue, write. “Actually, what I’m really grumpy about is…” You may be surprised to find what appears on your page! If you do this 3 times a week for 3 weeks, you will feel a marked improvement.

I hope that these 17 tips will help you find a way out of grumpiness. It’s very important to learn to control grumpiness because it can become a mindset. Learning to control grumpiness means bringing more light and happiness into your life.

I’d love to know how you get on with these 17 tips. What are your thoughts on grumpiness? Maybe you have found something that helps you to escape grumpiness? Please share it with us!

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Copyright: Mary Jaksch 2008

I hope you like the new look of GoodlifeZen! A lovely friend of mine, Alfredo Piccardi, was the catalyst for this new look and designed the lovely header image. Thank you, Alfredo!

Check out 2 guest posts I wrote:

• Zen Power Writing: 15 Tips on How to Generate Ideas and Write with Ease
• Zen and the Art of Travel

Photo by artct45

Research has shown that our brain changes if we practise meditation. These changes trigger a more positive frame of mind, and may even slow the ageing process.In his book Destructive Emotions, Daniel Goleman describes a very interesting collaboration between Professor Richard Davidson, a leading brain science, and an experienced Tibetan Buddhist meditator who used the pseudonym ‘Lama Oeser’. The Lama was asked to practise certain kinds of meditation, such as one-pointedness of mind and a meditation on compassion. During each of these meditation exercises, researchers looked to see whether there were any changes in the fMRI (Functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging).

I’m not a scientist, but this is what I understand about fMRIs: The images can show up activity in particular areas of the brain. Daniel Goleman says:

The EEG analysis bore particularly rich fruit in the comparison between Oeser at rest, and while meditating on compassion.

 

The results showed an increase in neural activity in an area that Davidson’s previous research had pinpointed as home for positive emotions, such as feelings of happiness, enthusiasm, joy, high energy and alertness.Goleman continues:

The very act of concern for others’ well-being creates a greater state of well-being within oneself

The finding lends scientific support to an observation often made by the Dalai Lama: that the person doing a meditation on compassion for all beings is the immediate beneficiary.

 

The research that Davidson did with Lama Oeser and others has shown that meditation can in fact change the structure of the brain.Reseach at the Harvard Medical school has also yielded some interesting results. Results show some unexpected changes in brain structure through meditation. Sara Lazar, psychologist and leader of the study says:

Our data suggest that meditation practice can promote cortical plasticity in adults in areas important for cognitive and emotional processing and well-being.

 

In ‘plain speak’ this means that in some areas of the brain the lining gets thicker proportional to the length of time that a person has practised meditation. These changes indicate that a meditator learns to process emotions and thoughts in a way that makes them feel happier.

There are indications that meditating may slow the ageing process.

Sarah Lazar says:

Our data suggest that one small bit of brain appears to have a slower rate of cortical thinning, so meditation may help slow some aspects of cognitive ageing.

 

That’s good news for all ageing meditators!I recently came across an interesting interview with Davidson about current brain research. Daniel Redwood asked him what led to his strong interest in brain research. Davidson replied:

My strong interest in brain research really came from my interest in the mind and its potential. I had the intuition and conviction from very early on that much of the world’s problems were caused by limitations in our mental functioning, that those limitations can be overcome with the appropriate intervention at the level of the mind.

 

Davidson goes on to say:

Modern knowledge in neuroscience underscores the idea of neuroplasticity, which means that the brain is an organ that changes in response to experience and in response to training. Essentially everything that we do, the totality of our experience and our behaviour, is constantly shaping our brains.

 

So, can meditation really make us happier? Davidson says:

Rather than thinking about qualities like happiness as a trait, we should think about them as a skill, not unlike a motor skill, like bicycle riding or skiing. 

 

I am grateful for this thought! If it is a skill, we can practise the art of happiness and become skilled at it. And in practising this wonderful skill, we can brighten the lives of others. What do you think about this?

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©Mary Jaksch 2008

Check out my guest post at Write to Done: Zen Power Writing: 15 Tips on How to Generate Ideas and Write with Ease

Interesting links:

GoodlifeZen posts from the Secrets of Wellbeing Series:

• Can Meditation Make Us Happier?
• Counting Your Blessings: 5 Ways to Increase Happiness
• Authentic Happiness
• Using Your Signature Strength
• Future Happines: Why We Get it so Wrong
• Does Choice Make Us Happier?

Other related articles:

• Indepth article about The Pursuit of Happiness
• The Lama in the Lab by Daniel Goleman
• Interesting article about brain changes and meditation on the Dalai Lama’s website.